Thursday Posting

So here is some random stuff that will distract you from work: 1) Store Wars. I like organic. 2) Hair Loss: I'm going to be bald soon. But it's okay, because my back hair is slowly creeping up my neck, and will re-colonize my head. Sorta like how the Greeks defeated the Trojans, only to see the Trojan remnant go on to found Rome. Think about that. 3) French Blogs: Apparently the french adademie' has decided that the word 'Blog' is too american. In french, 'weblog' should be 'bloc notes', or 'bloc' for short. And the people who write such things won't be known as 'bloggers', but 'le assholes francais'. 4) Cleaning the gene pool: 'Hey how cool would it be if we filled some pipes with gasoline, then lit it and attempted to swordfight with each other?' No, there shouldn't be any safety risk inherent in any part of that statement. Calling these kids 'retarded' would be insulting to people with Downs syndrome. 5) Michael Jackson is thinking of moving to Europe: I was at the gym this morning, trying to mentally prepare myself for the bench press, when a Jackson song comes on the air. Not old jackson, not black jackson, not even white jackson. Alien Jackson. It was one of his new songs, and it sounded like Peter Pan was trying to seduce one of the Lost Boys. But, since I have no offspring yet, I support Jackson's move to europe. He would actually fit in with all the eurotrash dandies. Except for the whole racial thing. Europeans are pretty racist, and aren't used to the sight of extraterrestrials in their town squares. Oh, here's a great quote from the article:

But where will he go in Europe? There's talk of Paris, and some have said Africa is being mentioned a lot. Brother Jermaine Jackson spends a lot of time in Saudi Arabia, but Michael a) doesn't like the hot sun and b) doesn't much care for Jermaine.

What the hell is Jermaine Jackson doing in Saudi Arabia? 6) Maybe Jackson could go here. 7) More jackson. MORE JACKSON!!! 8) And Barbecue Sorry about all the Jackson. It just seems like every time I read something about the trial I start hysterically laughing. I know it's a serious matter. I should be concerned for the welfare of the children. But everyone involved, even the people on the fringes, are completely batshit insane. Everyone has some bizzare amusing backstory, every person who takes the stand is 2 martinis and a power outage from claiming they've been sexually abused buy a) extraterrestrials, or b)michael Jackson, which is pretty much the same thing. it's just outstanding.