Summer starts in 2 hours and 10 Minutes

Why? Because that's when I get off. And I finally take vacation. I haven't been on a real vacation since I spent 7 months post-graduating drinking cheap beer in Prague, then accidentally got a job. So where will I be spending my upcoming vacation? Surprisingly enough, in Prague, where I will be able to feast upon the flesh of the living. Wait, that wasn't supposed to slip out. I mean I'll be able to drink cheap beer. And my parents are coming, so that means that my father can buy all my cheap beer for 2 weeks. Life is good. This is a pretty big weekend for me. Tonight, to start my summer vacation, I will do nothing. instead of erecting grand plans for my time off i'm just giving up now, and I accept that transmorphing into living geletin for two weeks is actually a positive thing. Tomorrow I will sleep until 2 in the afternoon, with the windows open to the cool breeze. I will then watch tv in a daze for a couple hours, and maybe bathe myself. A visit to the beergarden is probably in order, to acclimate my body for the evening's activities. I will then attend my gf's party, where i will drink too much beer and dance to classics like 'the final countdown'. I will be loudly yelling nonsense, spraying everyone within range with large amounts of spittle. I will be dancing/flailing like a disoriented baboon, and probably high-fiving everyone in sight. On sunday I will wake up and say 'shit' and close the blinds. I'll then stare at the celing for a while, then get some water. Then i'll say 'shit' and realize i didn't do any cleaning yet for my parents arrival. i'll clean for about 15 minutes, then collapse back in the bed for 2-3 hours watching the same clips rerun on CNN. At some point I'll crawl out of bed and go get some fried meat at the "cool restaurant" across from my apartment. Then I'll slog through the cleaning, paying particular attention to the petrified remains of a once-frozen chicken breast that have become part of the kitchen floor. Oh, and then i'll take the gf to dinner and a classical music concert. I'm not sure how i'm going to connect those two parts of the day. Then on monday my parents arrive. my ideal of how this visit should go is such: I'll spend the week in my room reading and watching tv, while my mom spends most of her time baking and cooking things. and my dad occasionally cleans something. unfortunately i think i'm obliged to give some sort of in-depth historical tour of eastern europe, which will seriously cramp my style of being a lazy, slovenly slacker. damn. anyway, here are some entertaining links for those of you who, like me, don't do too much at work on fridays:

1)CAPE TOWN (Reuters) - A police sniffer dog caused a political stink in South Africa's parliament after leaving its excrement under of the seat of a prominent opposition leader.

I find this damn entertaining. At least it wasn't a dead cat's head, signifying some sort of voodoo curse that would cause all the politician's personal financial records to be released to the general public. That would be gross and horrifying.

2) I had driven 1,800 miles in seven days, eaten 15 barbecue meals in a row, and finally found bliss in Texas. The four Texas barbecue meals I ate in 24 hours were better than any other barbecue I ever had in my life (save my one meal at Cooper's in 1989). I had found my barbecue bliss, and I was done. My lower intestine had ground to a complete stop, and I had a slight pain in my chest. It was time to go home.

Check out David Plotz's barbecue journal at Slate. Good stuff. So i'll try to post something on sunday.