A beer lover complains

I am not optimistic about the future of beer. I have escaped the beer wasteland of America, a land of false promises (Miller Light:"A True Pilsner") for the frothy goodness of Prague. But I know that every 5 minutes someone in America opens a Zima, and I am helpless to stop it. And the news keeps getting worse and worse. That damn ‘Sideways’ movie is the cause of it. I detailed in a previous post why I detested the ‘wine-influenced buddy movie’. But I say it again: a drinking movie shouldn’t have guys crying. I know that eventually I'll turn into a Wine guy, but that sure as hell doesn't mean I'm going to cry while chatting with my friends. But apparently America has become a land of sissies.

For the first time since the Gallup Poll began keeping track in 1992, more Americans say their alcoholic beverage of choice is wine, not beer. According to Gallup, 39 percent of U.S. drinkers said they imbibe wine most often, while 36 percent said beer is their favorite. The rest prefer liquor, and a small percentage rate all three equally. Technically, the pollsters said, wine and beer are statistically equal, considering the margin of error.

But there are still people out there fighting the good fight.

Jim Koch, who stars in commercials for his Samuel Adams beer, is unbowed: "I've been to these wine tastings, and they actually spit it out! We beer people actually enjoy drinking.

"We beer people actually enjoy drinking." I want that on a shirt. I want to go to some stupid Napa Valley wine tasting and loudly heckle some 'Indolent Wives Wine Club'. Now I know what the crusaders felt when the Pope called them to arms all those ages ago. I have a battle cry, I have my leader. I look forward to further revelations from the Great Koch.

Tastes great, less filling" was yesterday's debate. The latest battle brewing among beer makers: cans vs. bottles. It all started this month when Boston Beer Co. president Jim Koch, the maker of Samuel Adams, released his Beer Drinker's ''Bill of Rights." One major tenet: ''Beer shall be offered in bottles, not cans, so that no brew is jeopardized with the taste of metal.

Can this man do any wrong?

At B-Side Lounge in Cambridge last week,, 25-year-old Kimberly Newton clutched her 16-ounce Schlitz and declared: ''I am a can girl." Newton defended her beer against Sam Adams, saying the aluminum keeps the beverage frostier than bottles, and cans make it easier to gulp.

Kimberly disposes of her credibility the moment she refers to herself as a ‘can girl’. She should skip of the annoyance of having to gulp down her Schlitz and get directly to the puking on the sidewalk in her underwear. But the Czech Republic has it right. Draught beer all the way

Most Czechs look down on beer in cans and many even avoid bottled beer because there is nothing like draft beer or točené pivo.

I am home.

One definite growth area is for women. Female drinkers are keen on specialty beers, said Trýznová, who added that Hoegaarden, an InBev beer imported from Belgium, is popular with the ladies, thanks to its smooth, fruity taste. ... Dark beers are a persistent favorite with local women, perhaps thanks to an old Czech wives’ tale that says drinking dark beer enhances a woman’s bust.

Today's post has been a winding tale of beer and wine, of cans and bottles, of the lumpenproletariat and the glorious bosoms of Czech ladies. Some people ask me why I live in this country. I usually spout some nonsense about 'exciting business opportunities in the emerging economies of eastern europe.' But it's really all about the chicks and beer, man.